Our Family

Here are a few of my favorites from our photo session with Whitney's Photography
(at www.whitneysphotography.com). We had them done in October and we had so much fun. :)

The whole family

Jackson and Jameson. They're cousins, can you tell?

He was so good for our pictures - it kind of took us by surprise. All he wanted to do was ham it up!

LOVE this one - my baby's sweet face!

Our little family walking in Old Town Pocatello

Father and son

I haven't done an update on Jackson in a while so here goes: Jackson is 10 months old, 28" tall and weighs 21 pounds. He took his first steps on September 11 and he has just been getting better at walking every day. We encourage him to try crawling but he doesn't like it much. Now, he'll crawl until he gets to something he can stand up with and then he's off walking around furniture, toys and even his parents. It's gotten to the point that if I leave the room for a minute, he is on the opposite side of the room and getting into things by the time I get back in there. He loves our DVD shelves and every time I put the DVDs back up, he walks over there and starts screaming happy screams because he gets to pull them all off again. He loves to help me sweep the floor and his favorite TV shows are Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Special Agent Oso, Blue's Clues and Go Diego Go. He is so curious about our candle warmer with a huge Yankee candle on it. He has pulled it down twice . Both times it has almost fallen on his head. So needless to say, the candle warmer has been moved far out of his reach ... for now. Jackson was a turtle for Halloween - his costume was super cute and not too expensive.
He gives big wet kisses and is a good cuddler. Lately, he's become a major mama's boy and freaks out whenever I have to leave him alone. It has been so bad, sometimes, that I can't even take a shower without him crying until I let him in the shower with me. I love that he loves me so much and needs his mommy. But sometimes mommy needs some "me" time, even if it is only a ten minute shower.

I am still plugging along with online college, working, church stuff and taking care of my family. Davy has talked about wanting to move, but we can't do that for 2 more years because of our house. I have mixed feelings about moving away from the only town I've ever known. I don't know if I could take Jackson away from all of the family that he has here. On the other hand, there are so many other opportunities out there, maybe we should give them a try.

I am seriously considering changing my major ... AGAIN. I have wanted to go to culinary school for such a long time, but things have really gotten in the way of that. So, my major now is elementary/special education. I know that I could be an amazing teacher and it is something I would enjoy doing, but my heart just isn't fully in it. I think I'd be better suited in a culinary pastry program where I can use my creativity to make new and delicious desserts. I would even consider regular culinary school to become not only a pastry chef, but an executive or sous chef.
So many decisions to make and yet so much adventure and fun to come.

This is the month of "Thanks". I just want to take a minute to count my blessings and realize how much I really do have:

My sweet, patient, hard-working husband
My handsome baby boy
My parents
My siblings
My in-laws
My funny nephew Jameson
My grandparents
Davy's grandparents
Chocolate
Baking recipes
My talent at cooking and baking
Babies
A few of my co-workers
The other YW leaders at church
The young women that I have the opportunity to teach and learn from
My house
Running water, hot water heater
Heat and A.C.
Food in our cupboards, freezer and fridge
Mine and Davy's jobs
The gospel
Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost
Prayer
Scriptures
Scrapbooking
Pictures
Books
School

Some of those things I listed are basic necessities that some people don't have in their lives. Food, water, a roof over their heads. That is why I listed those things. Sometimes it's easy to get so caught up in all that we don't have, that we forget all that we do have. We take for granted the fact that dinner is on our table every night when some families (maybe in our own neighborhood) have only one meal every few days. I love to count my blessings and I love that doing so can always brighten my day. "Count your blessings - name them one by one - count your many blessings - see what God has done ..."

Books, Novels and Stories, Oh My!

I have a confession to make.

I am a book worm. I can't help it, I've always loved books and I can never seem to get enough of them. My family thought I was adopted for a long time because I preferred to stay in the house all day reading instead of going outside, hanging out with neighbor kids, eating and especially sleeping. To this day, I still cannot put a good novel down just because it's three in the morning and I occasionally lose consciousness, only to be jolted awake by the book falling heavily on my face.
My husband, being the good man that he is, lets me indulge in my reading and does his best not to be put out by my lack of interest in anything else, except for Jackson. He is a very good little man and is quite happy with playing on the floor or in his exersaucer or walker, but he's just so cute in his everyday playfulness that most of the time I drop everything I'm doing and play with him. It's just so fun! :)
Anyway, at the end of June, Davy took our ancient cell phones to T-Mobile and traded up for the amazing phone I have now. I never really wanted a "smart" phone because all I ever did on the other phone was make and recieve calls and text with the occasional ringtone download. It wasn't until mid-July when I discovered a BOOK READER ON MY PHONE. I was amazed that I didn't have to go buy an expensive Kindle just to quench my thirst for more books. Not to mention, this particular application is FREE with FREE book downloads. However, I'm not sure of the legalities of this application. Sometimes I feel guilty about not compensating the wonderful authors of the books in some way. I wish it wasn't so easy for technology to make the written and printed word seem so expensive and unnecessary. Maybe I'll have to look up copyright laws and decide whether or not to keep my book reader. For now, it seems that I can't do without it.

A while ago, I was reading a blog and I want to copy her idea. This is also inspired from the MTV show "If You Really Knew Me":

9 Things Most People Don't Know About Me

1: I was diagnosed with scoliosis at the age of 8. I was in third grade and I was terrified of what the other kids would think about my hideous back brace and the clothing I had to wear to conceal it. Mostly, I was treated with respect and sometimes pity. I actually had quite a few friends who would have stood up for me if I had been put down at all. In between 7th and 8th grade, after wearing a brace for almost five years, I had to have spine surgery. I did and I am now a mother, something that would have never been possible without that surgery. I am thankful everyday for my parents and Shriners Hospital.
2: I cringe whenever I hear paper sliding on other paper. Even thinking about it is setting my teeth on edge. Ugh. If I hear this noise, I imagine putting the paper in my mouth and the texture of it on my teeth makes me sick. Not that I ever put paper in my mouth, but I can't help imagining it. I know, I am so weird.
3: I didn't want to get married until I finished college and after I was married I didn't want kids for a long time. Obviously, that didn't happen, but I am so happy it didn't. I cannot imagine being anything but a wife and mommy.
4:You know that strange paper thing I mentioned before? Well, I have that same problem with ice. I get the chills even thinking about putting an ice cube in my mouth. Is this normal? I've never asked anyone else if they have ever felt this before, so I don't know, haha.
5: I don't particularly like camping, hunting or going for scenic drives. I would much rather read a book while traveling than see the "views". And if I'm outside on a nice day (which is rare) I have to have a book with me to keep me occupied. We have lived in our house almost a year and I don't think I've even spent even an hour in our yard. I just don't like being outside. My poor husband is the opposite of me in all of these things: he hates reading, he loves scenic drives, and hunting and camping.
6: The 24, 29, 30 and 31 of every month are always my favorite. Here's why: Davy asked me to be his girlfriend December 24, 2005 and I said "Yes". October 30, 2007 he proposed and I said "YES"! May 29, 2008 we were sealed for time an all eternity in the SLC temple and once again I said "Yes". May 31st, 2008 we celebrated at our reception with all of the friends and family members that couldn't make it to our wedding, what a great day! On December 29th, 2009, after a particularly forceful kicking, elbowing and jabbing from the little boy in my tummy, my water broke. Finally, on December 30, 2009 our baby boy was born after a hard, 23 hour labor. He is the best thing that I have ever been blessed with.
7: Having had a boy already, I can't imagine having a girl now. It's been this way ever since the ultrasound where we found out we were having a boy. When Davy and I talk about having another baby (not in the near future, don't worry) we can only think about a boy and what his name will be. I want a baby girl, but a baby boy just seems so much more tangible because I already have one.
8: The President of the United States of America almost made me late getting to my wedding. He was in Salt Lake City visiting with the Prophet of our church and there were government vehicles and agents all over temple square. I was so upset about him being there and making me late that I actually threatened to assassinate him if I missed my wedding because his stupid government cars were clogging up the road. Davy hastily told me to be quiet because I was saying this as we were crossing the road to get to the temple and there were secret service agents looking at me suspiciously. I am glad, however, that the President was there so that I have a unique story to tell my children and family.
9: I was a tom-boy all through elementary school and even before that. *Gasp* I know, it's hard to believe, right? My favorite color now is pink and I hate the outdoors and mud and bugs. But growing up in a neighborhood full of boys and with a little brother, I had to make myself more like them in order to have friends. At school I had girl friends and during recess we would all go and sit and talk. But as soon as I got home and those boys came over to our house, I was all about ninja turtles, dirt, mud, bugs, snakes, frogs, superheroes and bad guys, cowboys and indians and dinosaurs.

I wanted to write these "confessions" about myself because sometimes I think we forget or take for granted where we came from. We don't appreciate all that we have had in the past and all of the blessings that Heavenly Father gives us every day. I also think it is good, sometimes, to walk in others' shoes before you make a hasty judgment. You never know what another person has been through to make them the way that they are.

"I know that God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much". (Mother Teresa) I love that quote. Every day it is becoming more true to me. I have so many responsibilities with barely any time for myself. At the same time, I am so blessed with these things that they are so worth it.

"Come what may and love it" (Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin) Recently, a few friends and family members of mine have gone through miscarriages and have been dealing with infertility. Every time I hear of someone else going through these losses I cry. It is so unfair that people who aren't ready financially or mentally get to pop out a baby every nine months when women who would be wonderful mothers in every aspect are infertile or have to suffer the loss of miscarriages. To those of you who are living with this, I wish that I could share my fertility and fantastic pregnancy. I love you and I know that Heavenly Father will let you be a mom someday.

This week has been really rough for me. Nothing particularly bad has happened to me or my family, but I have just been feeling really down. After talking with my sister and mulling things over in my head, I am feeling much better. I rely on Heavenly Father and my family to help me through anything and I am so glad to have them. Writing this blog has been really therapeutic because I can get some of my thoughts out of my head. I'm sorry for my rambling and if I have bored anyone :)

We had family pictures taken a few weeks ago so I am expecting them sometime soon and when I do I will be sure to post them on here to show off. Until then, "Come what may and love it".

Nicholya

Scrap Swap Pages!

Here are my page layouts ... finally! I'm sorry I took so long to get the first one on here. I hope you enjoy!

Happy 6 Months!

Happy 6 months to my little Jackson! Although he's not so little anymore! This past month, he has learned to roll from tummy to back and from back to tummy. His head control gets better every day and I'm kind of afraid that we'll have a crawler by next month! He's still learning to sit up on his own and Davy and I love teaching him all of these things.

Jackson has learned to say MAMA, DA-DA, DAD, DADDY and BA-BA. Did you notice how many variations of Dad he has in there? Someone sure loves his daddy. Da-da is also his most used word (probably because it's the easiest to scream, hehe).

He is eating baby food and LOVES it ... well, almost all of it. His list keeps growing of the foods that he loves and also foods that he doesn't like so much. He is not a fan of sweet potatoes and peaches. If you give him applesauce, squash or cantaloupe, he'll scream like a banshee if you take it away from him, especially cantaloupe.

He has such a little personality. He's just recently been acting "shy" around people and snuggles his face in your chest when a new person approaches and smiles at him. It's so cute and I love it because I'm usually the one holding him so I get all of the snuggles. Jackson also loves to kiss cheeks. He opens his mouth wide, grabs your face, finds your cheek and hunkers down for a juicy cheek kiss. I LOVE IT! Another habit of his is fake coughing. He's added a little chuckle to his fake cough ... hilarious! My little man is becoming such a character.

In other news: Davy's sister Allison and her husband Chris are traveling from Virginia to go to Davy's little sister, Chelsie's wedding on the 10th. We are so excited to be with them and for them to meet Jackson. With any luck, Jackson will behave at this wedding ... (Yes, I was the mommy with the screaming child at the last family wedding, but you can't expect him to be happy in a 100 degree chapel, can you? Especially when we were stuck in the middle of the aisle with no easy way out!)

We are making our way to Salmon for the 4th of July weekend. We're excited to see family and for more members of our family to meet my smiley Jackson. He'll also get to interact with his cousins and have some fun playtime.

I hardly ever mention Davy in my posts, so I'm going to take a minute to tell him just how much he means to me(becuase I know he reads this blog, haha)

Davy, you are the best husband a girl could ask for. I knew I was going to marry you after our very first date. You are a loyal and kind man and you truly make me a better person when I'm around you. I never thought I'd find my soul mate at such a young age, but when I'm with you I just know that you are my "forever". I am so happy that we chose to get sealed to each other in the temple because now that I have you, I can't imagine losing you at death. And this precious life that we brought into this world, our little Jackson, has been such a blessing for the both of us. He has brought us closer and turned our world upside down. Thank you for giving me the gift that you are, the blessing that our son is and the promise to be with me through good, bad and for all eternity. I love you.

All About May

Oh how I love that little face! May was a really busy month for this little family. We celebrated my first Mother's Day, which was so fun. Davy did a good job of making me feel special.

Next was my 21st birthday! We hung out with family which is all I really want on my birthday anyway.

Jackson turned 5 MONTHS OLD on May 30th. I know I often say that he is growing up too fast, but he is growing up too fast. I just want to snuggle his little body in my arms all of the time. This month he has started eating rice cereal and oatmeal and what a funny boy he is. He wants to control the spoon all by himself:

He is still learning to roll over and sit up, and we're having so much fun teaching him. Everyday I thank Heavenly Father for sending me this little boy. I cherish every second I have with him and Davy. I love having my own little family and all of the joy that I recieve every day.

Davy and I also celebrated our 2nd anniversary May 29. We were married and sealed for time and eternity in the Salt Lake City temple on May 29, 2008. I will never forget that day because it was one of the happiest of my life. I am so glad to know that I will be with Davy forever, not just until "death do you part". Those words are so sad to me. And with having Jackson, I am also happy to know that he is sealed to us forever as well.

(I've always wanted to write this down) For those of you who don't know our "love story", here it is: I was 16 years old and was in senior choir at Pocatello High school. It was December and we were performing our Christmas concert. I'd felt obligated to invite an ex-boyfriend (we'll call him "T") to come and watch me perform.

After the concert, my friend Jodie's older friends invited us to Denny's to celebrate our performance. My ex was standing there so I also felt obligated to invite him to dinner with us although I didn't want him to come. When we got to Denny's, we were the last ones there, so I squoze between T and who I'd later find out was Davy Crockett.

As we got our food and everyone was talking, I found myself drawn to Davy. I completely ignored T and Davy and I talked the entire time we were there. After dinner, I took T to his car and politely told him that I didn't want to lead him on and that I hoped we could be friends. As he was driving away I couldn't stop thinking about Davy. I knew that I was going to be with him. I don't know how I knew, I just did.

I told Jodie that I wanted her to set me up on a date with Davy and she agreed. Mid-December, Davy picked me up in his little red Ford Tempo, and with Jodie and her date in the back seat, we drove over to Santa Claus Lane to look at the Christmas lights. Davy popped in a Voicemail CD and started singing with the songs, I knew right then that I was going to marry that boy. He was comfortable enough to sing silly love songs to me on our first "date", how can you not love that? We got done looking at lights and he took me home. We were standing on my front porch and I asked him if I could have a hug. After a surprised look, he gave me a long hug, said goodnight and went home.

Davy invited me to a Christmas party on December 23rd and when we showed up together everyone was surprised. They asked us individually if we were going out and we had to tell them not yet, because we still weren't officially a couple yet. Around 3:30 a.m. on December 24th, Davy and I were on MSN messenger together and he asked me to be his girlfriend.

I of course said yes and we continued to date until October 30, 2007. He proposed to me before we went to our Celestial Marriage class at the institute building at ISU. I immediately started planning our wedding and we were married in May 2008. We've had our ups and downs but I know Davy and I will be together forever. He is the sweetest man I've ever known and I can't imagine life without him. I am so grateful that we can be together and create this special little life that is our little Jackson. It's so reassuring to know that Families Can Be Together Forever.

So, on May 31st, this year, Davy and I traveled to Salt Lake City to visit temple square and remember our special day there two years ago.

If you want to know more about LDS temple marriage, why we chose "For Time and Eternity" and what we believe, visit: http://www.lds.org/temples/home/0,11273,1896-1,00.html

April 29, 2009 - April 29, 2010

April 29, 2009:

April 29, 2010:

Last year, on this day, my little Jackson was the size of a poppyseed. I woke up on the morning of April 29, 2009 feeling hopeful. I was hopeful because that was the day I knew I was going to take a pregnancy test. I am so happy that it came out positive! Jackson lights up my life and makes every day worth waking up to.

Jackson will also be 4 months old tomorrow! Time has gotten away from me again ... this past month he has learned to talk louder (didn't think that was possible but he has proved us wrong). Whenever I have him on his back, he likes to grab hold of both sides of my face (in most cases, he grabs two hands full of hair) and looks in my eyes and just starts screaming at me. Happy screams, of course. It always cracks me up.

Jackson has also discovered his cute little feet. He reaches for them, looks at them and tries to bring them to his mouth. I can just let him lay on a blanket on the floor and he'll play with his feet forever.

I am hoping that his Dr. will give us the go-ahead to start some rice cereal and vegetables soon. This mama is getting ready to retire the her "milk-cow" life and move onto the wonderful world of bibs, spoons, oatmeal and spaghetti all over the walls and ceiling.

In the news of Davy and Nicholya: In May, I am starting an online college course at Grand Canyon University. I will be working on a dual major: Elementary Education and Special Education. I'm so excited to be working towards a real goal for myself and my family. I've always wanted to be a teacher, and now, for once, I feel like it's within reach. It should take me a while to get my Bachelor's degree, but when I'm finished, Jackson will be getting ready to go into school himself and we'll have the same "hours". I won't be the stay at home mom I wanted to be, but this way, I can be working only while my kids are in school.

Kids ... yes, I said kids. No, I'm not pregnant again. (Thank goodness) but Davy and I do plan on having more children. Just a little clarification for anyone wondering: No second baby anytime soon unless God changes our plans and we have a "surprise".

Davy is still working at Coca-Cola driving his giant truck all over Pocatello to deliver you good people the caffeine you think you so desperately need. (Don't worry, I need it too. Don't get between me and my Coke!) He injured his back at work a couple weeks ago so he's now on light duty. Which also means he's also getting light duty pay. I don't think he's really happy working there, so we'll see what happens when his contract is up this October.

That's about all for our little family. We're looking forward to next month: Mother's Day, my birthday and our anniversary all in one month, Go me!

3 Months!

Jackson turned three months old yesterday and I'm still wondering where all that time has gone...

The time has gone to Jackson learning how to smile and giggle for us. He loves to wake up and smile at his mama. And I, of course love to see every one of those smiles and hear every one of the giggles.
The time has gone to my baby boy exploring the world around him. Each day he grows and grows and I'm just so excited I get to see him do it.

The time has gone to him growing 4 inches and gaining over 4 pounds. What a big boy! And doesn't he look good in Daddy's tie?

The time has gone to Mama and Daddy
learning how to meet each and every one of our little boy's needs, and Oh does he need a lot!





The time has gone to our little boy learning how to "talk" to us in his sweet baby babble. His favorite word is "GOO" and he uses it often. He's also learned to blow bubbles with the copious amount of slobber that he accumulates during the day.

Our baby is growing up right before our eyes and we are bitter-sweetly loving every single second of it.

Happy Valentine's Day!

The past 6 weeks has been full of so many ups and downs. More ups than downs, however, so that's good. Davy and I are doing well - we're still adjusting to being parents and are having so much fun along the way. We've really come to understand our baby boy's wants and needs. If I don't know what's wrong, Davy can figure it out and the other way around. We're so thankful for each day that we have with Jackson and know that we are so blessed.

Here are some pictures from the last 6 weeks; the first 6 weeks of our little boy's life:

Going home from the hospital at 2 days old

First bath!

We quickly realized just how much he loves his bouncy chair.

He definitely prefers it to the swing.

Jackson and his second cousin, Penny. Little Penny was due 5 days before Jackson. Jackson came 8 days early and Penny came 10 days late! Can you believe the size difference? I have a big boy!

Jackson, right before his blessing. Daddy did such a good job of giving him his blessing.

What a special day that was.

I'm feeling extra loving and thankful this weekend as it is Valentine's Day on Sunday. I don't really love V-day, but to me, this year, it's just a day to remember to be so thankful for family. I never knew that I could love someone so much until I gave birth to my son. I am so in love with him and my husband.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

Labor and Delivery

Meet Jackson Alvin David Crockett, born December 30, 2009 at 5:18 p.m. Weighing in at 8 pounds 1 ounce and measuring 20 inches long.

I'm excited to finally share my labor and delivery experience. It was such a long, hard process so I feel like I need to write this down to remember how my son came into this world.



Tuesday, December 29th at around 5:30 p.m. Jackson was much more active in the womb than usual, it was a constant, almost painful pushing and kicking. I got up from my chair to get some more water and started to "pee my pants" I couldn't stop the gushing so I knew that my water was breaking. I told Davy and we started packing for the hospital. I was excited to know that my body wanted to go into labor and I think Jackson's activity just before that helped my water break, our little guy was ready to come into the world! It was so exhilarating knowing that we were going to meet our little boy within 24 hours.



We arrived at the hospital around 6:30 p.m. where they tested my fluid and discovered that my water had indeed broken. They checked my cervix only to discover that I was still 75% effaced and only dilated to a 1. Because I wasn't having much progression, at around 7 p.m. they started me on an IV of pitocin to get my body kicked into gear. The contractions were coming, they were uncomfortable but certainly not too painful. I was far too excited to go to sleep so we just sat there, waiting for the nurse to check my cervix again. At around 3 a.m. they checked my cervix again and I'd slowly dilated to a 3.



I labored all night, getting little sleep in between contractions. They were painful and I definitely had to breathe through them. By 10 a.m. Wednesday, I thought for sure that I'd progressed because of the pain of the contractions. The nurse checked my cervix and gave us the bad news that I was still dilated to a 3, so she sent the doctor in to discuss options with us. He told us that I needed to progress soon or else I'd be forced to have a c-section.

I had surgery on my back in 2001 and needed to take my x-rays in for the anesthesiologist to decide if I could have an epidural for pain. The nurse anesthetist looked over my x-rays and decided that they would not be able to give me an epidural because of the scar tissue in my lower back, which could lead to some serious complications. I wasn't exactly set on the idea of an epidural, so I wasn't too heartbroken by this news.



While my doctor was in the room, he noted how much pain I was in and called for an anesthesiologist to give us a second opinion on the epidural. She came into the room and told us the exact same thing the first anesthesiologist told us. I was upset because the pain was getting harder to breathe through and I was losing energy and confidence quickly. The nurse offered me a narcotic pain reliever called Nubain that could be administered through my IV. We were hoping that the pain reliever would relax my body just enough so that my body would progress quickly to get our baby out. I immediately felt the effects of the Nubain and slipped into a deep sleep.



I awoke around 12 p.m. to some really horrible contractions. The nurse checked my cervix again and discovered that I'd progressed to a 6! It was such a relief to hear that this process might be over soon and I could finally meet my son. Because of my progress, the doctor decided to let me continue laboring instead of going immediately into a c-section. They were having problems with their monitering equipment. They were no longer doing a good job of monitering my contractions and the baby's heartbeat. This is essential information so the doctor had to insert an IUTC device to measure my contractions from the inside. He also had to insert an electrode into Jackson's head that was the best way of knowing his heartbeat. The insertion of the IUTC was worse than any pain that I've ever had in my entire life. I'd been so strong up until that point that I just screamed and screamed until it was over.



At around 3 p.m. the contractions seemed like they were one on top of the other and I could get no relief. The breathing exercises I'd been practicing thus far were harder to concentrate on and more intense. My doctor came in to check my cervix to find out I was dilated to a 9. My body was ready to push and kept trying on it's own everytime I had a contraction. I had to fight off the urge to just let my body push because my cervix wan't ready yet. I did that for about an hour and had lost so much strength that I just finally gave in. We discovered that Jackson was sunny-side up and not in a favorabe station for vaginal delivery. I tried to push, but nothing was coming from it. The doctor checked my cervix again to find out that it had begun swelling and there was just no way I was going to give birth vaginally.

I signed some forms to go into the operating room for a c-section and off we went. Davy and my mom were extremely worried and anxious, but we all realized that this was the only way to have a healthy baby.

I awoke in recovery to hear that I had a sweet little 8 pound 1 ounce baby boy that was 20 inches long. All I could do was smile and be thankful that I'd woken up from the anesthesia to finally meet my son. I thanked Heavenly Father for helping me through everything and the chance to raise my little boy.

I waited and woke up some more in the recovery room for about an hour when I was finally wheeled up to my room. Seeing and holding my son for the first time was the best feeling in the world. He is so perfect in every way and I'm so thankful that I have the chance to love him and be his mommy.