Be ... Happy?

You know the part during your wedding vows where you are asked to promise "for better or worse, in rich and in poor"? Well, we've been living with the "worse" and the "poor" for a while now. It's been tough at the Crockett residence. Sometimes I'm in sheer panic mode where I don't know what to do and how to cope with things, other days I lose myself in just trying to be happy with all the things in my life that are right.

This post isn't about all of my woes and hardships. This is about finding happiness when it seems like there is none to be found. The little things like chasing Jackson around the house and making him giggle like a maniac. The little (big) things like the fact that we now have health insurance (YES!) and it's not going to cost us all that much(even better). The little things like being able to kiss my husband every day and know that he's safe. The fact that despite working 40+ hours between two jobs, I get to spend every single morning with my son, just me and him.

About 2 months ago, I was searching all over for a new job. A 40 hour/week job that pays well with good benefits (yeah, right!) I interviewed for two different jobs and didn't get either one of them. Needless to say, I was disappointed and frustrated with everything. A couple of weeks later, I was promoted to floor manager at one of my jobs. This position gives me a pay raise, more responsibilities and quite a few more hours. Upon leaving my manager's office that day, I realized that Heavenly Father is watching over me. He loves me and knows me and he wants me to develop my talents in the area that I'm in right now instead of starting over with a new job. Sometimes it's so hard to let go and say, "Okay God - I'm leaving it all up to you, please just help me in whatever way you know is right for me." I know that prayers are answered and I'm so thankful for that knowledge.

Other things (and people) I'm loving right now:

Pinterest: I'm addicted. If you don't know what this is, go to www.pinterest.com RIGHT NOW.
Pandora: My favorite channel? Glee Cast Radio. The.Best.Station.Ever.
Pinterest & listening to Pandora = love.
Coupons: Still loving the coupons and the free or really cheap stuff I can get. Such a blessing.
Jackson: Love my baby who is going to be TWO YEARS OLD in just 3 short months.
Davy Crockett: Love that man. He's doing the best he can and stepping up to take care of Jackson when I can't be there.
My new church calling: 2nd Counselor in YW. There is so much potential and talent in our group.
My family:  I hope you know I appreciate you.
My friends: You know who you are and thanks for sticking by me even though I'm almost always unavailable and can't answer the phone.

Am I still going to have bad days? You bet. Do I have to let the bad days cast a shadow over the good days? Absolutely not. I've come to realize that the little things in life mean the most to me. Now, the trick is to always remember that and cherish those little things.

                                                                                                  Something to think about ...

{[Coupons]}

Retail: $103.61 I Paid: $16.45

As most of you know, I'm into using coupons. Like, REALLY into it. I'm not a freak like some of the people on TLC's Extreme Couponing, but I do go shopping every week and I refuse to pay retail. Retail: $66.70 I Paid: $20.30

A lot of people ask me why I do it and my answer is that I have to. It's not something that I can just turn off. Now that I know that I don't HAVE to pay the prices stores want me to pay, I simply can't go back.

Retail: $26.28 I Paid: $6.30

Growing up, we always had a fully stocked pantry, refrigerator, freezer, toiletry closet, etc. We never had to worry about not having anything to eat or having no shampoo and conditioner because my parent's made it a priority to have an over-abundance of the things we needed. I am simply doing the same thing, only I'm paying a fraction of the price to do it!

Retail: $50.00 I Paid: $11.78

This is the reason why I use coupons: I love saving money, A LOT of money. I love the thrill of getting $50 worth of groceries for just $5. I also love the fact that my stockpile keeps growing week by week with only a little effort on my part.

The concept and idea behind using coupons is that when something is really cheap or free, I "stock up" on it by using coupons. I stock up enough so that I won't have to buy any more of it for 3-6 more months.

Here's a scenario: Let's say that pasta sauce is $.25 this week by using coupons and a store sale. I go in and use my ONE coupon and go home with one bottle of pasta sauce. How long do you think that pasta sauce will last me? One meal, maybe two. Now, if I go to the store and use 10 coupons, and "stock up" on that pasta sauce. I'll have enough pasta sauce to last me at least 3 months. The next time I need pasta sauce, rather than running to the store last minute and paying $3.00 a bottle, I simply open my cupboard and "shop from my home". I will save myself $2.75 every time I need pasta sauce.

Since I began using coupons, my weekly grocery bills have went from $70 to $5-$20 depending on the week. That's a savings of over $200 per month. The best thing about it is that I come home with MORE than I ever did before I started to use coupons. I have laundry soap, deodorant, body wash, shampoo and conditioner, toothpaste, toothbrushes, pasta, pasta sauce, cereal, etc. to last us 6 months to 2 years.

If you want to know how to properly use coupons, just ask! I'd be happy to help you get some great deals, too!

Babies.

I am envious of all you pregnant ladies out there. Seriously. I wish I could be pregnant pretty much every day for the rest of my life. I never felt better than when I was pregnant. Even when I was HUGE and swollen I felt beautiful and I really miss that. ( I also miss the sweet little baby at the end of the pregnancy but that's a whole other topic for a later date.)

I have two sister-in-laws who are expecting babies later this year and I have to say that while I'm a little bit jealous I also know that now is definitely not the time for us to add to our family. I have mixed feelings about this because my female mommy hormones are screaming at me to jump on my husband and make a baby, but my brain is telling me not yet. I'm not a patient person and it's really hard for me to not get what I want, when I want it, regardless of consequences. I'm just that kind of person. I usually act on something before I think it through completely and that has gotten me in trouble a few times.

On a positive note: we do have a date set for when we will be trying to conceive again and I am just counting down the (hundreds of) days. No, I'm not going to tell you when, nice try though. :) I want Jackson to be my one and only "baby" for a while longer. He needs my undivided attention right now and I would prefer to have him potty trained before another baby comes along. I can't imagine having two little ones in diapers!

Jackson. He is growing up so much. I think every day he learns a new sign or word and actually uses it when he's supposed to. He talks to us more and when we ask what he needs, he can tell us. I love that he can do this. He has started running instead of just walking and is learning to climb up on our couches and get into more things. Here are his achievements so far:

Words:
Cracker
Ball
Mom, Mama, Mommy
Dad, Dadda, Daddy
Book
Cook
Dog
Grandma (Gama)
Grandpa (Ganpa)
Bottle (ba-ba)
Mmmmm (food)
Num-num (while eating food)
Banana (na-na)

Signs:
Cracker
Fish
Dog
Food
Please
Hurt
Baby
Juice
Banana
Milk

He will also point to his belly when you ask him where his belly is and he'll point to himself when you ask him "Where's Jackson?". He "stomps" and bonks his head on command which is super cute. I know I'm totally bragging about my kid, I can't help it, he's just so dang smart!

He fell asleep on the hard floor. Poor little guy was worn out!

Our little family is doing well. We can't wait for spring and summer and the new babies (that I get to snuggle, yay!) that are to come late summer. In the meantime, we are staying busy and always finding ways to count our blessings!

Jackson's First Year.wmv

Jackson's First Year

I have come to realize how much I neglect my blog. I know all of you are hanging on the edge of your seats, just waiting for me to post the next fascinating look into my life. (ha.ha.ha) As you know, I'm a mom, and my son always comes first. Jackson is walking now and getting into more mischief than ever, so I find myself constantly on my guard when I am the only one watching him (which is most of the time). I have a busy life, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

It is always this time of year that I look back and think about the previous year and all of the feelings I had and things that I did. I think it's hard for people who are not parents to understand just how incredible life is when they hold that little bundle that is their child in their arms for the very first time. I know before I had Jackson, how I imagined it would feel but it never compared to the actual thing. I feel like everything in my life has led up to the moment that I gave birth to that baby boy. Only when I held him and kissed him, was my life truly complete. I knew then that nothing else (except for welcoming another little one, or two, or three, into our family) would ever compare to my little 8 pound boy. No career goals or personal goals accomplished could ever outshine the miracle of giving life. I am just so happy that I am entrusted to be Jackson's mom and what a great blessing I have been given.

I remember that first month after we brought Jackson home from the hospital. THAT was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. The 23 hour no pain-med, natural labor sucked, but it couldn't compare to the sleepless nights and mastitis infections and recovering from a c-section that was my first month with my little boy. But you know what? I would do it all over again, a million times over, because it's worth it! The outcome - a healthy child is always worth any amount of pain I could ever go through.

I put together a little movie about Jackson's first year. The post above this one is the movie. This is a lot that we have done this year and all of the things that my little boy has accomplished in just 365 days. Enjoy!